June 5
Categories: Caring Bridge Journal
Interesting and a little bit eerie…
1. I wrote this on Facebook in Feb. of 2009 when the “25 random things about me” was going around:
“I wish I was better as describing the great joy, peace and love I experience everyday as a child of God. My heart hurts for the people in my life who don’t have this.”
– Never imagined so many would read my thoughts on the love, joy and peace of God.
2. My friend Sara Jo wrote this to me in a card EXACTLY one week before Anna’s stillbirth:
“My prayer for you is that you and Anna will always be close and that together you will teach many about our Father and Savior.”
– Never imagined that my experience with Anna would give me a powerful testimony about the faithful presence of God during the storms of our life and that I would have the platform I’ve had to share it.
3. I wrote this about 1-2 weeks JUST BEFORE Anna’s stillbirth (the beginning of my “storm”) in response to a “favorite passage” question:
“If the question is what verse lately has made an impact on me and been a comfort to me, it would be Romans 9:20-21. “But who are you, a human being, to talk back to God? Shall what is formed say to the one who has formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’ Does not the Potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for special purposes and some for common use?” I have struggled recently with how small my life seems to be and small my role seems to be in the world and in the church. Shouldn’t I have done some great thing for God by now? I don’t like attention or being in charge, but still, shouldn’t God have done something “big” through me by now, if I’m living faithfully? Am I fulfilling His purpose for my life? He says that He who wishes to be greatest should be least, but I have trouble being least, being unnoticed and believing that’s where I should be. How am I making a difference for God like that? I find great comfort in these verses from Romans, which makes me quit worrying and questioning the Potter. It’s ok if this clay is for common use.”
-Sure sounds like I was asking for all this, doesn’t it?
It is so interesting to look back over one’s years and see the hand of God at work, leading and directing, teaching and admonishing, correcting and molding. What a stubborn piece of clay I’ve been at times, and yet He’s worked His plan, and He continues to work it out.
Finally, my mom sent me this interesting link. I encourage you to check it out. How she arrived at Jeffbridges.com is beyond me, but this is right on: http://www.jeffbridges.com/perception.html
